Authorpreneur Dashboard – CJ Heigelmann
Crooked Fences
Literature & Fiction
A prejudiced war veteran battling PTSD returns home to pursue his dream of becoming a police officer. But is he ready? Crooked Fences is a fiercely honest story of change about a returning war veteran’s battle to overcome the debilitating effects of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression, before entering the New York State Police Academy. First, he must confront the hatred of racism and homophobia instilled in him by his father while working at a low-income housing project.
Book Bubbles from Crooked Fences
Own it! Finding Truth Through Honesty
There are times in our lives when external forces, people, obstacles or events can create environments of unpredictability, negativity or stress. These factors can exacerbate the conditions of those suffering from PTSD, anxiety, and depression, as they are forced to confront each situation. Avoidance, deception, and redirection are a few paths that many choose to travel while coping with their conditions, which summarily end in the stagnation of their personal growth, causing resentment and ultimately encourages low self-esteem. Like a circular argument, no progress is gained. The foundation of healing and positive personal change is found within honesty. Being honest with one's self is difficult, but it is paramount before one can be honest with others. To end all doubt, one must first find truth through personal empirical honesty of self. Own it, and lay a perfect foundation for the future.
Going From Peace to Chaos: Sleep and PTSD
A good night's sleep. That's what most people hope for when they lay down at night. It's a time to recharge your batteries from an active day and for you to heal yourself both mentally and physically. The mind and the body must rest. But for many sufferers of PTSD, a good night's sleep is just a nightmare. Those same nightmares can induce the mind and body into an unhealthy state and reproduce the effects of the sufferers original trauma. Screams, sweats, headaches, elevated blood pressure, chest pains are only a few of the symptoms experienced during PTSD triggered nightmares. In this excerpt, the main character returns home from the war to spend his first night in years sleeping with his significant other. What she soon witnesses is terrifying to her, and the state of his true psychological condition is now realized. Now, she must learn how to cope and has become affected by his condition.
When Sexism Backfires..Oops!
No, you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, and this applies to all forms of lazy stereotyping. In this verbal exchange between the main character, Todd; who is the property manager, and a female resident who is fed up with continually reporting problems with her air conditioning unit, come to a head. He doesn't know many specifics about her, other than she is very attractive. When she attempts to share her thoughts on what is wrong with the unit, he takes offense and patronizes her in an attempt to marginalize her position. Her response, as well as his reaction, shines light on his deep-rooted sexism, as well as his embarrassment. With the seed of his shame planted, he begins to learn the fallacy of sexism.
War is Not Like a War Video Game
In this excerpt, a disabled combat war veteran and a young potential military enlistee have a discussion about the stark differences between real war, and the war video game they just played together. Many youths are influenced by violent war games and at times can become disillusioned to the actual destruction, brutality and long lasting after effects of war on all those involved. Here, the main character's best friend attempts to educate a young African American man on these realities, and the young man discloses his some of his motivations for wanting to enlist in the military.
A PTSD Sufferer's Thoughts on Church
In this excerpt, The main character fulfills his promise to escort an elderly African American woman to her church. He has never attended an African American worship service before and is initially pessimistic due to his racial and stereotypical beliefs, which have been compounded by the PTSD he is suffering with from the war. However, he soon realizes the positive effect that the experience has on his addiction. Although he does not prescribe to any specific religious belief system, his internal dialogue illustrates the value to sufferers of PTSD and addictions, to surround themselves with positive and hopeful people within a safe and peaceful environment.
A Wounded War Veteran Shares His Insight
In This verbal exchange, the main character (A war veteran) asks his best friend (A disabled war veteran) for permission to bring over a young adult who is contemplating joining the military. The exchange offers an enlightening perspective on the common disillusionment of potential military inductees and the public at large, who are influenced by the commercial advertisements of military recruitment, where only half of the story of military service is portrayed.
Wisdom Shared to a Prejudiced Police Recruit
In this verbal exchange, the family is sitting at the kitchen table eating supper, listening to their guest (Todd - the main character) make racist and stereotypical statements about the African Americans living in the low-income housing community which he manages. Todd believes his views will be validated by the rest of the host family. However, the patriarch of the family (Mr. Pearson) shares a story of past events during the Vietnam War, which was the catalyst for his own paradigm shift against the ingrained prejudices that he grew up with.
