Not a Blueprint: It's the Shoe Prints That Matter

If you’re curious about how I managed to leave the toxic work environment, it was the actions of those inner voices. We’ve all heard them at one time or another — perhaps not as dangerous, though. I couldn’t help but listen. They were screaming to escape. To satisfy your curiosity, I shall briefly walk you through the unfolding of that day.

While I sat reading the daily emails on my computer, I began hearing the inner voices. I took the palm of my hand and tapped it against the side of my head. Still, their words lingered. No matter how much I tried to turn off the voices, they wouldn’t settle. They screamed out, “It’s time to kill, f*ck  ’em; screw ’em all; first, kill the b*tch! Why are you still here? They didn’t care about you . . . . Kill ’em all, now!” I heard the voices echo inside my head. As my mind raced, I felt my pressure rising and my heart pounding. I continued to hear these eerie voices.

Before I realized it, I was spread out on a stretcher, strapped down, and screaming about what happened . . . . I bawled it all out, . . . . The EMTs couldn’t check my vital signs fast enough. After assessing my breathing, my racing pulse rate, and the surging blood pressure, they worked diligently to stabilize me.
The first-aid office contacted Dawn before transporting me to Northwestern Memorial Hospital. After arriving in the emergency room, my vital signs became more irregular. With my mind ripped to pieces, all I could do was lay there screaming . . . . ’Cause once the rage is finally unmasked, it can explode, releasing all the toxicity of anger.