I awoke to a doctor standing over me in the hospital room, telling me that I needed to wake up. There were police officers who needed to talk to me. I kept my eyes tightly closed thinking if I did that long enough, everyone would leave.
Eventually, though, I had to talk to them. I couldn’t form thoughts. I felt sick, confused, and completely overwhelmed. As I went over in my mind the facts of what had happened over the past 48 hours, tears poured down my face, and the police started asking me so many questions.
“Where is he?” they asked.
“I don’t know,” I replied.
“When did you last have contact with him?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did he force you to do something you did not want to do?”
“I don’t know.”
It was the only answer I had in me for the next 20 questions that came my way.
The Romeo & Juliet Delusion is an inspirational memoir about the dangerous relationship with my former fiancé, who was a meth and heroin addict. In addition to the overwhelming aspects of being the significant other of a drug addict, there was physical and emotional abuse, including some very traumatic events that happened over the course of our long-term relationship that escalated to a near-death experience in 2015.
I am sharing my story to provide readers with a better understanding of two of the most serious social crises in the world today: drug addiction and domestic violence. From both the perspective of my personal experiences as well as from the perspective of being a family and criminal law attorney for over 15 years, I am providing a rare and unique insight into the reality of deeply loving a drug addict, remaining in a dangerous relationship for much too long, and watching my life deteriorate as I was desperately trying to save his life.
The World Health Organization (WHO) reports that one in three women worldwide will be subjected to partner violence in their lifetime. The National Center for Health Statistics (NCHC) reports there are 253 drug abuse deaths every single day. As the reader journeys with me through both my dark days and my light days, they will learn to acknowledge their own addictions, toxic relationships, and unhealed traumas. I share a self-help modality of approaching addiction and domestic violence from the perspective of curiosity and compassion rather than judgment and criticism. These particular life experiences are shameful, and people in similar circumstances crave a relatable writer and an authentic path to healing from someone who blazed the trail herself with blood, tears, and endless mistakes.
After my relationship ended, I spent the next six years of my life experimenting with different ways to free my soul from the traumas I experienced. I initially thought the solution to healing was to simply close the door on the entire experience, but what I learned along the way was that this was not going to be a situation where the experience could just be locked away nor a return to a “normal” life as if it had never happened at all. Rather, it was going to be a situation that required me to reincarnate myself and use my insight and experiences to help other people do the same. Being a victim of your circumstances is not where life ends, but rather where life can truly begin again.
As a successful professional woman, I never could have imagined ending up in the relationship I did or living the life I led. Do not ever think something cannot happen to you. Life has a very strange way of proving us wrong.
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