Letting It Go

Don't Believe What You Think

Jack and Jill, a popular children's magazine ran a feature called, "I Used to Think..." where an 8-year-old could contribute a story about an old misconception about the world. Beliefs like "the tree-tops touch the sky' and 'my mom always knows where I am' were common. I watched 2 6-year old boys almost come to blows about whether the tooth fairy was real, and I simply could not convince a 4-year-old that it was a cartoon character and not he who had smashed the monster. It is completely normal for children to believe this way. And it's the job of parents and other care takers to gently help kids to understand how the world really works. The problem comes when children don't talk about their beliefs about the world--especially when they are under stress. Parents often accidentally cause cause the stress by making threats or promises or simply repeating ordinary statements like 'boys don't cry' or 'stop asking for stuff.' If you were on the receiving end of experiences like this, and most of us were, they may still be shaping your view of the world. It may be time to start really listening to the stories you tell yourself and see if they are causing unnecessary anxiety or stress in your life.