Too Much Isn’t Abundance Either
In order to experience abundance, you need to be able to experience enough.
When a group of workshop participants were asked what they experienced as scarce in their lives, answers included money, savings for retirement, time, space, help, education, appreciation, etc. In trying to define what enough would be, a new question arose—enough for what?
In the same workshop, answers to the question “What do you have too much of in your life?” focused on stuff. Paper, email, clutter, and collections of all kinds of things, were reported as detracting, not adding to anyone’s experience of joy and satisfaction.
Accumulating too much is one way of trying to compensate for an experience of or a belief in scarcity.
I am realizing more & more that my happiness is tied to my money, so I try to soothe unhappiness with things. I am realizing that spending is bringing me no joy, in fact it's making me more aware of unhappiness in my life. I don't feel like I have enough even though I make a solid mid-range salary. I just feel really disconnected. And that can lead to further destruction. I am hoping this search will lead me to abundance. PL
Accumulating too much may also be something you learn from someone else who experienced scarcity. You save things just in case you might need them some day.
Michel had trouble throwing things away. Magazines and reports were stacked in piles waiting to be read—when he had time. He realized how he had learned to save things when he helped his parents, who had lived through the great depression, when they moved to a smaller home.
He discovered that they had carefully saved every rubber band and paper clip. They had accumulated enough to last a small office for many years and enough band aids to stock a clinic. Bed linens and towels they didn’t ever use were stuffed into the linen closet.
Wine and Other Stuff
Willem: I recently discovered a pattern that must be derived from an old experience of scarcity. I’ve learned to appreciate good wines, even though wine was not part of my upbringing. I have a wine cellar, and even though I’ve collected enough bottles for the next few years, I always feel uncomfortable if I see only a few empty racks in my stock. That’s the moment I start looking around for opportunities to fill the gaps.
Laurie: I learned to save things from my own parents. Too much is uncomfortable—it makes it hard to find things when I want them. Shopping—buying more stuff at bargain prices—was a highly regarded skill in my family.
When I realized what I was doing, I devised the “How Much Is Enough” exercise that I used daily for many months to help me relearn how much is enough for me.
Here are two different activities to help you find what is just right for you.
How Much is Enough?
Possible areas for exploration are listed below in no particular order:
food, money, clothes, travel, contact with friends, study, writing, impact on others, email, fitness, exercise, hiking, grand mothering, clearing space, contemplation, giving/sharing, client contact, control, newspaper reading, shopping, email, novels, magazines, cooking, working, vacations, sex, alcohol, excitement, calmness, coffee, jewelry, sports equipment, screen time, cars, house, Xmas gifts, telephone time love,, movies, drugs, medication, professional/activity, feelings, guilt, anger, suffering, agonizing, activities with children, eating out, watching TV, etc.
Fill in the blank with your choice of one of those topics.
What is just enough_________for me?
Getting just enough for you leads to relaxation, satisfaction and happiness. Use this form to help you to think about what is just right for you.
Click Follow to receive emails when this author adds content on Bublish