Pause

“IT’S A SOULMATE CONNECTION, gifting you with that dream about him.” Crystal, wrapped in fringy scarves and tribal necklaces, broad beautiful face serene, delivers her truth. She channels her information from a ten-thousand-year-old deity, so it tends to reduce complications of ambiguity in her life.

Lindsey’s been doing some spiritual seeking herself since the cancer diagnosis, but isn’t quite ready to accept Crystal as guru. She refrains from a skeptical rebuttal as Crystal forks up some veggie salad and smiles, bathed in an appropriate halo of light. The sun’s broken through the cloud cover to shimmer off the marina ripples and in through the window of the Bayside Café.

Megan, across the table, does roll her eyes, short hair gleaming with new reddish streaks. “Lindsey, you dodo-brain! It’s no big mystery.” She cuts off a piece of rare steak and pops it into her mouth, talks around it as she chews. “I told you Newman moved back to town a few years ago. And how he ended up getting divorced a year ago. Remember? You were so wrapped up in the Nick stuff, I guess you weren’t listening.”

Megan’s an old friend of Newman’s from high school days, has kept in loose touch as he moved at large through the world, from living on an East Indian ashram, to selling Nepalese handicrafts at fairs from his hippie van, to now consulting in third-world countries, helping villagers set up self-sustaining cottage industries.

Lindsey pushes her empty chowder bowl away just in time for their server’s tattooed hands to whisk it onto his tray and slosh more water into her glass. “Thanks.” She shrugs at Megan. “Well, at least I got a good laugh out of it. Here I am in the hospital basement, thinking he’s some wacko out of the psych ward and can I get the door unlocked fast enough to flee.” She shakes her head, chuckling. “I think he knew all along who I was.” Was he laughing at her? It didn’t feel like it at the time.

Crystal, with the authentic warmth that shines through whichever New Age trend she’s on, reaches over to squeeze Lindsey’s hand. “It’s good to hear you laugh, Lin. Accept these gifts from the universe.”

“Tell you what, my dear.” Megan fixes her with a practical eye. “What you ought to take is the opportunity to give him a call.” She flips open her cell phone and taps at it, whips out a business card, and writes down a phone number on the back. “He’s one hot prospect for the right gal. Financially secure, and he’s into all those outdoors things you go for.” She gives a little shrug, unusual for briskly efficient Megan. “So, okay, those guys I tried to set you up with were geeks, at least it pried you out of the house. But Newman’s different.” Her voice sounds wistful. “He… he’s a really good man.”

Lindsey’s touched by their caring, but she’s jittering away from this conversation. She pushes her palms out, fending off. “Look, that’s not where I’m going.” She’s damaged goods, but not about to be an object of charity. She cringes at the memory of his eyes, that clarity seeing way too much. She’s not ready for that. And what could she offer a man? Anyway, he recognized her and didn’t say anything.

“One of these days, Lin, you’re going to look in the mirror and see how beautiful you are. Haven’t you been using that ylang-ylang essence I gave you? It’ll open up your heart chakra, help you balance your male-female energies.” Crystal is giving her the Earth Mother gaze.

Lindsey wishes she could find something that made sense to believe in, but maybe that’s the trouble–she both wants and is skeptical of easy answers.

Megan snorts. “What she needs is a close encounter with a big, hard—”

“Megan.” Lindsey waves her down, glancing over at the next table, where two men in suits have fallen silent, eavesdropping.

“Linny, I know you! What’s it been, over two years? You’ve got your juices so backed up by now, your teeth must be floating. Do you wonders to have a good, screaming—”

“Megan! Cut!” Lindsey slices crosscuts through the air with her hands. “You keep this up, I’ll be forced to use my blackmail material.” She’s come armed this time. Reaching into her purse, she pulls out a yellowed letter from Megan, dating from their twenties when Lindsey was in the Peace Corps in Honduras. She’d found it when she was going through some old boxes, tossing out reminders of Nick. Opening the folded paper, she reads from mid-page, “…and was he hot!! Honestly, we were so revved, and I’d never done it on a pool table before, but his frigging boot laces were in knots and we couldn’t get the damned things off him. So I grabbed the kitchen knife, and—”

“Lindsey Friedland!” Megan, face reddening, grabs at the letter as Lindsey pulls it out of reach.

She sits back, pouting. “You better watch it, Lin! Don’t forget I’ve still got the photo negatives from that bicycle trip on Orcas Island. You know, the ones with you wearing nothing but sea kelp? Not to mention the topless hiking shots….” She makes another lunge and this time rips the letter from Lindsey’s fingers.

“Careful! That’s got historical value.”

“My God, I can’t believe you saved this.” Megan scans the page, laughs, flips it over. She reads on, sobering, fingers gripping tighter.

“No, not that part.” Lindsey tries to take the letter back.

“No, no. Wait.” Megan finishes the page and drops the letter into her lap. She looks up at Lindsey, her eyes brimming. “Hey, gal friend,” she says softly. “You were my angel, you got me through that shit with Brent and the….” She bites her lip and shakes her head, mutters, “To think I might have married that jerk just because I got knocked up.”

“Hey, I didn’t mean to rake that up.”

Megan reaches over and squeezes her hand.

Crystal is looking baffled, turning her face from one to the other. “What’s going on?”

Megan smiles, squeezes Lindsey’s hand again, and releases it. She turns to Crystal. “Lin got me through some kind of heavy-duty stuff back when we were roommates, finishing up college. Then she was off to the Peace Corps. That was before her river-rafting gig. Talk about Amazon woman! She was my hero.”

“Wow.” Crystal blinks, turns to give Lindsey a surprised look.

Lindsey’s shaking her head. “Megan’s never been known for exaggerating.”

“No way!” Megan slaps her palm on the table. “You saved my silly butt back then, my dear, and now I’m returning the favor. I think Newman’s got just what you need, give you a little jumpstart back into your sassy old self.” She reaches over to stick the business card into Lindsey’s purse. “So you’ve got his cell number now. No excuses!”

Dusting her hands, she briskly pulls out her daytimer. “Okay, Crystal, it’s your turn to choose the spot next month. But have a heart. Not that place with everything made from goat milk curds….”