Where do you go when life as you know it is turned completely upside down? It happened to me. The life I knew and loved vanished on August 7, 2013 when my college sweetheart and husband of 33 years chose to end his life. There are not words to describe my shock and devastation. Though I was surrounded with wonderful, loving people, none of them could restore the half of me that died that day. This was a God-sized task! This is my journey through shock, grief, mourning and healing. It is the very personal and profound journey I took to ultimately discover that no matter how deep your pain…God is always there and He is enough. If you are grieving, God Is Enough will give you hope. I understand what you are going through, and I am here to share my message of hope, healing and faith.
M.E. Louis is a native of North Carolina. She grew up in Chapel Hill where she attended the University of North Carolina and met the love of her life, Tate, who became a pastor. After 33 years of marriage, Tate took his life on August 7, 2013. God is Enough is her story of hope, healing and faith.
The owners of a local funeral home attended the church where my husband was pastor. They became good friends during the 7 years we were there, as they did many funerals together. I specifically sought out the embalmer at this funeral home following Bob's death. I hugged him and said, "You have given me such a gift. The last time I saw Bob he looked awful. He looks wonderful now. Thank you." Several close friends would accompany me on the many funeral home visits. Following his death, I visited the funeral home because I wanted to talk to him like I did when he was alive. We would pull up chairs to the open casket and I would talk to him for hours. I did this every day including the morning of his cremation. I told a fellow widow, "I would have liked to have taken Bob home, put him in the corner of the bedroom, then I could talk to him every day." She totally understood what I meant. I miss sharing life with him.
God is Enough
Like a robot, I told Neil I was going to put the phone down to go inside and get some scissors. Even though I knew my husband was dead—his tongue was blue and sticking out of his mouth and his face was as white as a ghost—I did what Neil told me to do. I was shaking and everything seemed to be so quiet and still. It was like I was living in a dream and everything was happening in slow motion. It seemed that my mind was taking hours to process what was happening.