“Then I looked again at all the acts of oppression
which were being done under the sun.
And behold I saw the tears of the oppressed
and that they had no one to comfort them;
and on the side of their oppressors was power,
but they had no one to comfort them. ”
Ecclesiastes 4:1
New American Standard Bible
Adok slowly pushed open the door to the shed.
“Alenka, where are you? Are you in here?”
The shed was dark. Even with the sunlight streaming
through the open door he could see only what was directly
in front of him. Adok searched the wall for the light switch.
He finally found it and clicked it on.
Alenka was sitting on top of a large crate in the corner.
She was still wearing her gym clothes—black shorts and
a white t-shirt. Normally, her blonde shoulder-length hair
was neatly combed and curled under. Now it was swept to
one side in a loosely braided ponytail. She looked sad and
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weary. Crying had left her cheeks puffy and her eyes red and
swollen. Adok could even see the tracks where her tears had
rolled down her face.
“What do you want? Get out of here and leave me alone!”
Alenka’s voice was hard and mean. She sounded like
Fraulein Hess.
“Alenka is also my mother’s name. So you see I can’t
leave you alone. It would be like losing my mother all over
again.”
“I’m not your mother.”
“No, and you’re not Fraulein Hess either.”
“What do you know about it? You know nothing
about me!”
“Then tell me Alenka. Tell me what happened. How did
you come to be here? I was climbing a tree in the park when
Fraulein Hess and Franziska kidnapped me.”
“Oh! How nice for you. At least you know your parents
are still alive. At least you didn’t…”
Alenka dropped her head and cupped her hands over her
face and began crying again.
Adok rushed to her side and sat down next to her on the
crate. Wrapping his arms around her shoulders, he kissed her
cheek and pressed his head against her forehead.
“You can tell me Alenka. You can tell me anything. I
won’t tell anyone. You can trust me. Go ahead. It’ll make
you feel better.”
Alenka lifted her head and wiped the tears from her eyes.
She sighed then shook her head. She didn’t look at Adok. She
spoke as if she was talking to herself.
“They killed them all, an entire village. The German
soldiers lined them up and killed them. Some they chased
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down in the streets like they were nothing more than rats to
be exterminated.”
Alenka turned and looked directly at Adok.
“But they weren’t rats! They were human beings, some
women, but mostly men and boys, some of them as young as
seventeen. My parents and grandfather, two uncles and three
male cousins were among them—the Great Kaminski’s. If
only my family hadn’t decided to try and revive the circus act.
You see, a couple of years after Germany invaded Poland, the
circus that my family had performed in for two generations,
disbanded, forced to actually, because the owner was a Jew.”
“For a year, there was no work and no money coming
in. My family didn’t know how to do anything else. We were
acrobats, circus people, born and raised. Even my mother had
come from a circus family. She was the daughter of the Krol
Kavalier’s, a popular husband and wife trick horse riding
team.”
“Having gone through what little savings we had, we
were broke. So father and my uncles decided to put on a
mini circus featuring just our high-wire act and clowns. We
didn’t even have a tent. We had to perform outside, which
made it risky because if there was a breeze, the direction and force of the wind could cause a fall. The show was canceled
if it was raining or too windy. It was all makeshift but it was all we had, and we were successful for awhile. We started in
April, and by June, we had performed nine shows mostly in
small towns like Pile, Cozies, Wagrowiec and Szamotuly.
Katowice was our last scheduled performance. We had been
performing practically nonstop since we started. Of course,
my grandparents were too old to perform now. The two of
them sold tickets and had a clown act. My grandmother,
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mother and two Aunts were exhausted. So was I, but I never
complained. The only dilemma was where to stay to rest up
for a week or so before we began performing all over again.”
“When we traveled with the circus, the crew always
camped on the outskirts of town. We never mingled with
the townspeople where the show was held. The owner was
adamant about that. The main reason was because it was more
economical, but the other reason was to maintain an air of
mystery. It helped that people thought of circus performers as special and unique. It drove ticket sales. But ever since the Nazi occupation, camping along side the road or in an open field
became dangerous. If caught by the SS, you were automatically
suspected of being Gypsies and could be sent to a concentration camp. Germans hated Gypsies almost as much as they hated
Jews. So we had to spend money to rent a place to stay.”
“Small, rural towns were the best places to find cheap
accommodations. Lidice was a friendly little village just
northwest of Prague. Only, there was no public lodging
places in Lidice. After asking around, we were directed
to the farmstead of the Gorski family at the far end of the
village. The family was accustomed to renting out their barn
to travelers.”
“We intentionally avoided putting on a show in Prague,
or even stopping there, because of the assassination of the
SS governor, Heydrich somebody, the month before. The
Gestapo was still searching for the assassins. After three days of driving nonstop from Katowice, we came upon Lidice
on June 8th. We had never heard of the town before. But
somehow the Nazi’s concluded that the small town of Lidice
was connected with the assassination. Little did we know it
would be the last place we’d ever…”
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Alenka’s voice cracked. She suddenly hopped down from
the crate and began walking around. She became distracted
fiddling with the boxes and large crates as if she was interested in what had been inside or what some might still contain.
Adok watched her, bracing himself for the horror of what
she would say next. It was like watching a cluster of black
clouds gather in the sky and waiting for the storm to come.
Crack! Adok flinched. A small crate on top of a larger
one fell on the floor, breaking the bottles inside. Alenka
stared down at the broken glass and spilled liquid. The word
Iodine was printed on a piece of broken bottle.
“This is what happened to the town of Lidice. See!”
Alenka kneeled down and picked up a large piece of broken
crate. “This was Mr. Gorski’s barn,” she said, then put it
down, “and these were the people, my family,” she said,
placing aside eleven pieces of glass from the broken bottle. She then got on her knees and rubbed her fingers in the Iodine.
“This is their blood,” she stated, smearing the red Iodine
on her cheeks.
“I’ll never forget that morning,” Alenka began.
Adok noticed the strange far-a-way gaze in her eyes.
She appeared to be in a trance. She was staring into space
as though she had traveled back in time, as though she was
there now, reliving it all. Alenka described every sight, sound and action in vivid detail, as if she was reading from words
written upon her heart.
Her lips moved and nothing else. She remained
unnaturally still as she revealed what happened on that day
just a year ago.
It was a perfect summer’s day. You couldn’t imagine,
Adok, anything bad happening on a day so beautiful. There
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wasn’t a cloud in the sky, and the glow of the sun was like a
dollop of warm butter spread evenly over the land. The sound
of chirping birds, mooing cows and clucking chickens filled
the air. Floating in the breeze was the sweet scent of wild
flowers and garden roses mingled with the smell of freshly-
cut grass, piled high in hay stacks.
It was Wednesday, June 10th, and like every morning, I
woke at seven o’clock sharp, automatically, without an alarm
clock or the help of my mother. My three cousins, Barnim,
Gallus, Ansel and I slept up in the hay loft, on blankets spread over large heaps of straw. Barnim was twenty years old,
Gallus, nineteen, and Ansel, seventeen. Like my father and
uncles, they had dark brown eyes and thick, wavy chestnut
brown hair. They were still asleep, snoring away. I could hear the adults moving about below. As soon as I opened my eyes, I
caught sight of a small sparrow perched on one of the ceiling
planks. I held out my index finger and whistled to try to get
it to come to me, but it flew out of a crack in the roof instead.
I got up and rushed to open the window hatch and
watched it glide across the sky. It was flying south, toward
town. It flew over the main road. I was so distracted watching it that I didn’t notice what was happening on the ground. It
wasn’t until the sparrow had flown out of sight that my eyes
finally rested on the men. It looked like over a hundred of
them were marching towards the farm, barefoot, with their
hands above their heads. Following slowly behind, spread
across the road and open field in at least twenty jeeps, were
Nazi soldiers, standing in their vehicles, pointing their rifles at the crowd of town’s people.
“Oh, my God!” I raised my hand to my mouth.
Before I could alert my parents, I heard the barn door
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open and the gruff voice of Mr. Gorski. He was a husky,
board-shouldered man with a shiny bald head and a thick
black mustache.
“Go quickly! You must leave. Hurry! The Nazi’s are
coming,” he shouted and then ran out. Mr. Gorski hopped
into his truck where his pregnant wife, Lada, and two young
sons were waiting. He sped away into the woods in the
opposite direction.
“Papa, I see them coming too!” I shouted from the
hay loft.
“Wake your cousins,” shouted papa and my uncles, Fillip
and Jerzy, in unison.
My aunt, Nadia, Uncle Fillip’s wife, became hysterical
and starting screaming. Grandmother immediately slapped
her across her cheek.
“No time for crying,” said grandmother. Grandmother
was a commanding figure. Though short and chubby, she was
tough and resilient and very proud, especially of her husband
and family. She had worked as a nurse in the First World War
and had been in many emergency situations where a cool
head was the only thing that saved a patient’s life. Aunt Nadia covered her mouth and nodded. She immediately began
gathering her things, as did everyone else. My cousins had
awakened and were changing out of their pajamas as was I.
After a few minutes, papa shouted: “No! Stop! We don’t
have time. Leave everything, clothes, everything. We have to
get out of here, right now!” he ordered. Fortunately, by then, my cousins and I had almost finished changing.
My cousins were all dressed in blue jeans and white
t-shirts. I changed into a pink pleated cotton skirt and a white, short-sleeved blouse that button down the front. I rushed to
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put on my white ankle socks and brown loafers. I didn’t comb
my hair. Before I went to bed last night, I had brushed it to
one side and plaited it into a single braid and clamped the end with a white barrette. It would have to keep for now, I thought.
My three cousins quickly climbed down from the loft, but
I took one last look out the window hatch before descending.
The Germans and the crowd of men was still a good distance
away. We had time to leave before they reached the farm
house. Only, our car and two trucks were parked on the south
side of the barn, visible from the road.
“Ok, everyone crotch down and enter the vehicles from
the barn side only,” papa said, “then drive away quickly,
straight ahead, into the woods. Drive and don’t stop no matter what happens,” he told his two brothers. Papa was to drive
the car with mother and I and my grandparents. It was the
first vehicle in line.
My father was the youngest of his brothers, yet, he always
took the lead, especially in a crisis. Maybe it was because his two older brothers stopped school at sixteen, which was all
Polish law required. My father had completed the twelfth
grade and even passed the Matura. It qualified him to go to
college if he wished. He met mama, got married and joined
the family trapeze act instead.
We bunched together and headed out.
Mr. Gorski had left the barn door open. But all of a
sudden, it closed. We all froze. Our faces were shaded with
fright as we glanced at one another.
“The wind must have blown it shut,” papa said.
“What wind?” asked Uncle Jerzy, papa’s oldest brother.
Finally, papa went to the door. It opened easily and he
peeped out and looked around.
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“Come on!” Papa waved to us.
The eleven of us followed him outside. When we reached
the south side of the barn, we all ducked down and sneaked
around the corner to our vehicles. The vehicles were parked
one behind the other. We did as papa said. We entered on the
barn side. We continued with our heads down once inside.
Papa started his car first, then Uncle Fillip in the last
truck. But Uncle Jerzy’s truck wouldn’t turn over. The engine
kept clicking off. I peeped out of the side car window in the
backseat. The crowd was still a good distance down the road,
too far to determine if any of the soldiers saw us or not.
Finally, after the fifth try, Uncle Jerzy’s truck started and
we all drove straight ahead, heading west. As soon as our car
entered the woods, my mother, grandparents and I sat up and
cheered. I glanced back at Uncle Jerzy and waved. So did my
grandparents who were sitting next to me. We’re safe; we’re
safe, I kept thinking. But we hadn’t been driving through the
woods for more than ten minutes before we heard screaming.
It was a woman’s voice.
Everyone in the car looked around, but all we saw were
trees. The shrill of the screams were loud enough for the
whole world to hear, I thought, let alone the Nazi’s back on
Mr. Gorski’s farm. The path in the woods curved right and
we immediately came upon Mr. Gorski’s big grey truck. Both
doors were open. No one was inside. Mr. Gorski suddenly
emerged from behind a huge tree.
“Help me! Help me, please! My wife is in labor and I
don’t know what to do.”
Lada Gorski was lying on a blanket on the opposite side
of the tree in a long white, short-sleeved frock. Her black
hair was twisted in a maiden braid and wrapped around the
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crown of her head. The Gorski boys, ages five and seven were
sitting beside her.
“Let me see,” said grandmother. She examined Mrs.
Gorski, feeling her stomach while Lada continued to cry
and scream in pain.
“It’s a breech. The baby is coming out feet first. I must
turn the baby or both of them will die.”
At first no one said anything. I was thinking we weren’t
far enough away to stop here. Surely one of the German
soldiers saw our vehicles leave and would follow us. I kept
looking behind us as did my cousins.
“We don’t all have to stay,” said papa. “The rest of you
can go.”
“I won’t leave your mother,” said grandfather firmly.
Papa nodded and turned to mother. “I want you and
Alenka to go with Jerzy, his wife Celine and Barnim. I’ll stay here with mom and papa. It will be alright. As soon as the
baby is born, we’ll come on.”
“Why must you stay? You’re not the oldest,” said mother
in a low voice.
“Halina,” papa said mother’s name softly the way he
always spoke it when there was a disagreement between the
two of them.
Mother didn’t answer. She just buried her head in papa’s
chest while he held her in his arms, stroking the long braided ponytail hanging down her back. The right sleeve of her blue,
rose-printed dress hung off her shoulder.
People always mistook my mother for my older sister.
She looked much younger than her age and more Swedish
than Polish, with her light blue eyes and porcelain white
skin. My uncle’s wives were blondes too, but neither of my
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aunt’s hair was the same snowy-blonde as my mother’s
or mine.
“Ahhhhhhhhh!”
Mrs. Gorski’s scream was even louder and more piercing
than before.
“Halina, Celine, quick! Halina hold her arms. Celine
find something for her to bite down on. Nadia get another
blanket and some towels.”
I grabbed the Gorski boys and led them away as my
mother and aunts did what grandmother told them.
Grandmother’s hands were inside Mrs. Gorski. My mother
was on her knees leaning over the top of Lada Gorski’s head,
holding down her arms. Aunt Celine took Uncle Jerzy’s wide,
black leather belt from his pants, folded it twice and placed it in Mrs. Gorski’s mouth.
“Shh, shh, were almost there,” grandmother assured
Lada. “There!” grandmother sighed after several minutes.
“The baby is turned.”
Grandmother slowly removed her hands from inside
Mrs. Gorski, bringing the top of the baby’s head out along too.
“Now push, push hard, the baby is almost out,” said
grandmother. Mrs. Gorski grunted and pushed and pushed
and grunted, biting down on Uncle Jerzy’s belt until she
pushed the baby’s body completely out. Grandmother slapped
the infant’s bottom and the baby started crying. Aunt Nadia
rushed over with a blanket from one of the Gorski’s suitcases
and wrapped the baby in it.
“You have a beautiful little girl,” said Aunt Nadia to Mr.
Gorski as she handed him his daughter.
Mr. Gorski took his baby girl and placed her in his
wife’s arms.
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“We would like to name our daughter Marcela, after you
Mrs. Kaminski,” said Lada to my grandmother. The baby
had stopped crying and was lying contently in Mrs. Gorski’s
arms, staring up at Lada with beaming brown eyes.
Grandmother just smiled and nodded as did we all.
For a second, the world seemed normal and no different
from any other occasion when a baby was born. The happiness
of the moment took over and we all forgot where we were.
The woods around us had disappeared, and it was as if we
were all back on the Gorski’s farm, safe and secure in the
prospect that our lives would go on in the days ahead exactly
as the years before.
But my cousins hadn’t forgotten. They were watching out
for the Germans. Uncle Fillip’s two son’s Gallus and Ansel had climbed trees to warn us if they saw anyone coming. Barnim
was back down the road several yards, hiding in the bushes.
Suddenly, Ansel and Gallus began climbing down at the
same time Barnim appeared from the road.
“I think there coming, I hear engines,” said Barnim.
“We saw them, four jeeps filled with soldiers,” confirmed
Gallus and Ansel. This time no one screamed. Mr. Gorski
immediately picked up his wife while she was still holding
their newborn, and put her in his truck. I helped the Gorski
boys into their father’s truck and ran to papa’s car. The
slamming of doors and reviving of engines was all that was
heard.
Mr. Gorski sped away so fast, he left skid marks. Papa
was right behind him. I looked back and saw Uncle Fillip
driving practically on top of us. He almost slammed into the
back of our car, but he quickly swerved his truck off the road to the right and sped pass us through the woods.
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“Gustaw! Gustaw!”
Papa looked in his rearview mirror when he heard his
name. Everyone else in the car looked back too. It was Uncle
Jerzy, Aunt Celine and Barnim running towards us on foot
as fast as they could.
Papa put the car in reverse and began backing up.
“Jerzy’s truck must have stalled again,” said papa.
We had almost reached them when Aunt Celine fell. At
first, I thought she had just slipped. But then, Uncle Jerzy
began falling too. His head snapped backward at the same
time his arms flew up in the air. I saw blood spurt out from
his back before he fell. He hit the ground hard and lay in the dirt with his eyes wide open.
From out of the trees roared jeeps filled with German
soldiers. Papa quickly shifted to drive and slammed on the
gas. We sped away, but I kept looking back.
“Oh, no! Barnim! Papa!”
Papa passed me a helpless glance in the rearview mirror,
but didn’t reply.
I felt a touch and looked down. Grandmother had placed
her hand on top of mine. But she didn’t speak or look at me.
Despite the warmth of her touch, a chill ran through me
along with the compulsion to witness my cousin fate.
I looked back again and saw Barnim fall to his knees
then raise his hands in surrender. The drivers in the jeeps
kept coming at full speed. I thought they’re going to run
Barnim over. But as the last jeep drove by, a young Nazi
leaned over the side, placed his pistol to my cousin’s head, and fired. I screamed. It happened so fast. The jeep never stopped or slowed down. Just like that, they killed my cousin, like he was nothing more than a pop-up target in a shooting gallery.
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Two jeeps pursued us. The other two drove off in the
direction of Uncle Fillip’s truck. The path in the woods
curved left and right several times before it straightened out.
The same young soldier that shot Barnim aimed his pistol at
our tires, firing twice. The back tires deflated immediately
causing the car to swerve off the dirt road. Papa couldn’t
control it. The car zigzagged, rattled and wobbled.
“Papa!” I screamed. We were heading straight for a tree.
Papa slammed on the brakes and stopped the car inches
before impact.
Papa’s chin hit the steering wheel. Mama flew into the
dashboard and my grandparents and I were hurled forward
into the back of the front seat.
I don’t remember getting out the car. I only remember
standing in line with my parents on one side of me and my
grandparents on the other. I was standing in between my
mother and grandmother. I felt a throbbing pain in my neck
and shoulders. Papa had a gash in his chin. Grandfather had
a bloody nose. Mother’s lower lip was also bleeding and there
was a purplish-red bruise on grandmother’s cheek.
Eight Nazi’s surrounded us. Standing directly in front
of me was the young soldier that killed Barnim. He took off
his helmet and looked at us. He seemed very confident and
sure of himself. He stared at mama for a long time and then
at me even longer. I didn’t like the way he kept grinning and
looking me up and down. He had a funny-shaped oblong
face, a pointed, upturned nose and thin lips. His eyes were
light blue and his hair was as yellow as the sun. He was even
younger than I first thought. Up-close, he looked to be just a boy of sixteen, which was the youngest any male could join
the army. He was only an inch taller than me. At twelve, I
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stood five feet. But he was cocky. No one could tell him he
wasn’t ten feet tall. He strutted up to me and began stroking
the un-plaited tip of my braid. I winced and pulled away from
him. I kept seeing his thin, grubby fingers pulling the trigger and shooting Barnim. The thought of those same fingers
touching me now made me sick to my stomach. Repulsed, I
slapped his hand away and spit in his face.
The soldier reacted and reached for his pistol.
“No!” screamed my mother and grandparents. Mama
quickly grabbed me and shielded me partially behind her
back. Papa also tried to come to my assistance but was stopped by a gun placed directly against the back of his head by one
of the soldiers standing behind us.
I was scared and thought the boy soldier would kill me
too. Instead, he chuckled and released his hand from his
pistol. My saliva had landed on his top lip. He didn’t wipe my spit off with his hand. He licked it off with his tongue, then puckered his mouth and blew me a kiss. Drawing back his
lips, he let out a full-throated laugh, and this time, the other soldiers all joined in.
They were still laughing when Uncle Fillip, Aunt Nadia,
Gallus and Ansel appeared on foot with their hands behind
their heads. Two jeeps followed behind them with soldiers
pointing their guns. My uncle and his family joined us in line.
“Bewegen Sie schnell auf diese Weise!” said a much older
soldier standing in one of the jeeps that had just arrived.
He was pointing in the direction of the Gorski’s farm. The
soldier that held a gun to papa’s head pushed him forward
and we all started walking behind each other in a single file.
As we got closer to the farm, we began hearing gun
fire. The gun fire came at regular intervals. Sometimes it
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was single shots of five in rapid succession. Sometimes it
was a flurry of machine gun fire. The gun fire started, then
stopped, and after a few minutes, started again.
We finally reached the spot where our vehicles had
entered the woods. The familiar sight of Mr. Gorski’s white
stucco, gambrel-roof barn was directly ahead of us. German
military vehicles were parked all around it. Two trucks filled with mattresses were parked on each side of the closed barn
doors where a number of soldiers stood guard. The mattresses
had been taken off the villager’s own beds. Some of them still had bed sheets on them.
The men from town were standing in a long line directly
in front of the barn door as if they were waiting to enter a
theatre to see a picture show. They were being marched inside
in groups of five. Each group of men retrieved a mattress from one of the trucks before entering.
Under guard, a group of townsmen were digging a huge
ditch several yards away on the south side of the barn.
As soon as we reached the barn, the soldiers tried to
separate us. Papa, grandfather, Uncle Fillip and my two
cousins were ushered to the back of the line with the other
men. They pulled mother, grandmother, Aunt Nadia and
I away and ordered us into the back of an empty pickup
truck. Only, grandmother wouldn’t go. She wouldn’t leave
grandfather and started hitting the cocky, young soldier who
shot Barnium in his chest with her fists.
“No! Leave me alone. I stay with my husband,”
grandmother yelled.
For a sixty-five-year-old woman, grandmother was
strong. She was too big for the boy soldier to handle. She had big bones and heavy hands. During the tussle, grandmother
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drew back her arm and swung. She swiped the boy soldier
across the face so hard, his helmet flew off his head and
he stumbled backward. When he bent down to retrieve it,
grandmother bumped her big, round butt into his narrow
butt and sent the cocky soldier plummeting, face down in
the dirt. It was the exact stunt my grandparents performed
in one of their clown acts. It always got lots of laughs. It did this time too.
Everyone erupted into laughter, even the soldiers.
“Shut up!” yelled the boy soldier. His face had turned
cherry red. He got up off the ground and drew his pistol.
When he shoved it into grandmother’s face, all the laughing
stopped.
Mother, Aunt Nadia and I were standing in front of the
back end of the truck. I grabbed hold of mother’s hand and
held my breath.
Words spit out the soldier’s mouth fast and furious as he
held his finger on the trigger.
“Sie polnische Kuh des Fettes! Ich möchte sehen, dass
wie viel jeder lacht, nachdem brenne ich durch, gehen Sie
hässlich weg!“ voran.”
As much as I could understand, he called grandmother a
fat Polish cow and was going to blow her ugly head off.
“Halt! Lassen Sie sie sein. Wenn die fette polnische Kuh
es vorzieht, entlang Seite geschossen zu werden ihr Ehemann,
lassen Sie sie.”
Everyone turned to see who was ordering the young
soldier to stand down. As soon as the German soldiers saw
the officer, they all snapped to attention and stood stiff as
stone pillars.
As for the rest of us, each of us let out a gasp upon seeing
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that the officer was a woman. That was the first time I laid
eyes on Fraulein Hess.
She was so beautiful, not because she was the most
attractive woman I had ever seen. Mother was much prettier.
But there was an aura about her, a regal air. She exuded pride and self-confidence. I could tell just by looking at her that
she wasn’t afraid of anything. Even my grandmother looked
impressed.
The frauleins golden blonde hair cascaded over her
shoulders under a white officer’s side cap with silver piping.
A round, tri-colored cockade was embroidered on the band.
She was bedecked in tan leather, lace-up boots and white,
gabardine Jodhpur trousers with a matching white, long-
sleeved jacket that buttoned down the front. On both sides
of the jacket were two boxed-pleated side and breast pockets
adorned with silver-pebble buttons. Pinned to the left breast
pocket was a large silver and black metal cross. Above the
right breast pocket was a silver eagle, clutching a swastika.
Strapped to her waist was a black leather gun holster.
Fraulein Hess walked up to grandmother.
“My name is Captain Dagmar Hess of the Women’s
Auxiliary Air Force, the Luftwaffe Artillery Division.” Her
voice was sharp, but calm and dignified.
“I applaud your willingness to stand with your husband.
It takes strength and courage to do so and should be admired.
Come, let me escort you.”
Fraulein Hess held out her arm. Grandmother linked
arms with the captain as she led grandmother to the back of the line beside grandfather. She was six feet tall and walked with her chin up as straight and commanding as any male officer.
All the townsmen in line bowed their heads when
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Fraulein Hess approached as if she was royalty. Grandfather
took grandmother by the hand, kissed her forehead, and then
bowed his head to the captain as did my father, uncle and two
cousins. No one said a word. Fraulein Hess merely nodded
back in recognition of their respect. She then turned and was
about to walk away in the other direction when she noticed
my mother and I.
She walked over to us. She smelled of Ginger Blossoms.
The fragrance was refreshing and very subtle, like a whiff of
a summer’s breeze.
Smiling down at us, she looked mother and I over
carefully. She touched the loose curl hanging over mother’s
eye then touched the tip of my braid.
“The two of you have excellent features and both of you
are so young and pretty—sisters?”
“No. This is my daughter,” mother replied with an edge
in her voice mingled with a tinge of arrogance. I looked at
mama wondering why her tone was so curt and so did Aunt
Nadia, standing beside me.
Fraulein Hess noticed it too and moved in closer. Her
mood quickly changed. Her jaw stiffened. Her eyes narrowed.
Her cheeks became taut and drawn, and her lips curled into
a snarl. When she leaned over and stared into mama’s eyes, a
quiver ran through me. Fraulein Hess was leaning so far into
mama’s face that mother had to lean backward to avoid the
two of them from butting heads.
“Since you have the ability to produce such beautiful
children, we must make sure you produce more of them, lots
more.”
Fraulein Hess snapped her fingers and the nearest soldier
came running to her side.
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The captain straightened her posture.
“This one the men can have for lunch. Pass the word
around,” she told the soldier without taking her eyes off
mama. She then reached over, grabbed hold of my braid and
yanked me to her side.
I fought her, kicking and screaming. As I was being
pulled away, I heard my mother scream and my father
shouting: “No, fraulein no! Please stop!” Everyone in my
family was yelling now at the top of their lungs.
Somehow, Aunt Nadia managed to reach the fraulein
and me without being apprehended by the soldiers who had
seized my mother and the rest of my family.
“Please captain, Madame, sir. Please, my sister-in-law
didn’t mean it. Jealousy, that’s why she responded the way she did. She’s always been a little jealous. You know how some
women can be when they see another woman reach a position
above what is considered to be a woman’s place. Please, forgive her. Please, don’t let this happen! She has German ancestry,
you know, on her mother’s side.”
Aunt Nadia was begging Captain Hess, holding onto
the captain’s arm. I wrapped my arms around the captain’s
waist displaying all the affection towards her I could muster.
For a moment, it seemed our efforts to soften the captain
were working. She stopped walking and dragging me away
when Aunt Nadia revealed mama’s heritage. My mother’s
grandmother was German, born in Frankfurt.
Fraulein Hess looked down at me. Standing on my tip
toes, I reached up to kissed her cheek. She responded by
bending down to meet my kiss. But the moment my lips
touched her face, a flurry of gunshots rang out—pow, pow,
pow, rattle-tat-tat.
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Aunt Nadia screamed the names of her husband and
sons. I froze in place, afraid to look back. I didn’t have to. I no longer heard the sound of my parent’s voices and I knew I
would never hear them again. It was only Aunt Nadia’s voice
I heard now.
“You evil, Nazi witch!”
Aunt Nadia lunged at the captain, hissing like a cat.
Captain Hess quickly pulled her pistol from her holster and
shot Aunt Nadia twice in the stomach at close range. The
force of the gunfire propelled my Aunt backward and she
landed a couple of feet away. She laid still, her eyes closed
and her blonde hair spread over the dirt like a blanket. Two
large blood stains saturated her yellow cotton dress. The right corner of her mouth was also filled with blood.
Fraulein Hess turned and looked down at me. The
look on her face was seething. The weight of her stare sent
a shiver through my veins, and suddenly, my legs gave out. I
felt myself falling and then I felt myself being lifted up. The scent of Ginger Blossoms filled my nostrils mingled with the
smell of blood.
I was being carried away. I lay still, listless and too weak
to move. With my head tilted back and dangling off the
captain’s arm, all I saw was blue. I spotted a sparrow flying
across the sky and my mind flashed back. I couldn’t help but
wonder if it was the same sparrow I had seen in Mr. Gorski’s
barn that morning. I thought. If only I could fly. If only
people could fly away whenever they were in danger, the sky
would be filled with humans, right now, all fleeing for their
lives.
Fraulein Hess put me in the back seat of a car, tapped a
soldier on his shoulder and we drove away. I was still lying
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in the captain’s arms, but afraid to look at her. I stared at the car roof instead.
Fraulein Hess began stroking my braid.
“I’m your mother now,” she whispered.
The emphatic tone of her voice was surprisingly soothing.
She even managed to sound like my mother. I lowered my
gaze until my eyes fell upon her face. I couldn’t help it. I
began to cry. Fraulein Hess lifted my head to her shoulders
and I wrapped my arms around her neck. It felt good to be
held. For the first time that day, I felt safe.
I closed my eyes, imagining that I really was in my
mother’s arms. I could have kept them closed forever, but the
car hit a bump and my eyes popped open involuntarily.
All of a sudden, I was looking out the back window. I
saw the barn in the distance and the vague images of soldiers
dropping bodies into a ditch. A spot of yellow and then of
blue flashed before my eyes, then disappeared.
Adok didn’t know how long he had been crying or when,
during the course of Alenka’s story, he had started. His face
and collar were drenched with tears. In his mind’s eye, he
saw everything Alenka relayed as clearly as if he was there,
experiencing it with her.
For awhile there was silence. Then Alenka rose abruptly
off the floor and walked around the shed, smashing and
knocking over all the crates and boxes she could.
“You’re right, Adok, Fraulein Hess isn’t my mother,” said
Alenka, between tipping over crates.
“She’s just what Aunt Nadia called her, an evil, Nazi
witch! And I hate her, I hate them all. Who gave Germans
the right to go around killing people and to determine who’s
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worthy to live and die? The Bible says God created man. No
where in the Bible does it say that God created Germans first
and every other race has to subject themselves to their dictates and approval.”
A shadow appeared outside the door while Alenka was
speaking. Someone was listening at the entrance. Adok
noticed the figure when Alenka proclaimed her hatred of
Fraulein Hess. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw it, but he dared not look. He knew who it was without looking. The
moment he spoke the name in his head, Alenka stopped what
she was doing and turned towards the door as if she had
heard him speak the name of Fraulein Hess out loud.
Fraulein Hess stepped into view and then inside. Alenka
backed away. Adok slid off the crate, but didn’t move.
Suddenly the shed was stuffy and too hot to breathe as if it
had caught on fire and was filling up with smoke.
“Adok…leave,” Fraulein Hess ordered in a slow, grating
growl. Her right hand was clutching her gun belt.
In defiance, Adok balled his fists. He was determined
not to be afraid and leave Alenka to face Fraulein Hess alone.
“Whatever you do to her, you’ll have to do to me too,”
he said.
“A-DOK!”
His name sounded like a crack of thunder. The sheer
force of it made Adok flinch. He fell down, stumbling over
his own feet.
“Go on Adok, I’m not afraid anymore,” said Alenka.
Her voice was calm and resolute as her eyes remained fixed
on Fraulein Hess.
Adok got up and kissed Alenka on her cheek, then
walked cautiously towards the door.
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“Don’t hurt her!” He shouted to Fraulein Hess. His voice
squeaked with emotion.
Turning sideways, he made his way towards the door.
He was certain Fraulein Hess was going to swat him, but she
didn’t even look at him as he slid pass her.
As soon as he stepped outside the door slammed shut.
Adok waited at the door for awhile, trying to hear what was
going on inside. He couldn’t, and so, he slowly began walking
towards the wrought iron gate, crying as he went. He was
imagining the punishment Fraulein Hess was administering
to Alenka shut up in the shed.
Oh God! Please, help her, help her!
Fraulein Helga and Serena immediately popped into his
head and Adok shot through the gate. If anyone was able to
save Alenka now, the two of them could.
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