Portia asked, “So, tell me, dear, how was your day today?”
“Oh, the usual. Lots of boring cases and pleading faces.”
“Did you stand up to the people? Did you give them what was coming to them? Or did you give in to them?”
“Well, in some cases--”
“I thought so! Pontius Pilate, you have got to stand up and be a man! When are you going to stop letting people push you around? And what about that no-good tyrant, Herod?”
Having finished, Pilate put down his utensils and reached for his wineglass. “What about him? I haven’t heard a thing from him since that visit he paid us. Hope I don’t either. Anyway, I’m through listening to him, the old buzzard!”
Portia reached for her wineglass. “Well, I’m glad to see your attitude hasn’t changed in that regard since his visit.”
“He called me a fool, didn’t he? No one shall call me a fool and get away with it!”
Portia’s eyes lit up as she exclaimed: “Now you’re talking! But, what are you going to do about it?”
“I said I shall have his territory, and I shall!”
“Excellent! That’s my Pilate talking! But, how will you go about it?”
Pilate put his finger to his lips. “Good question. I can’t just take my troops and invade his territory. Caesar might not like that, and I could end up with nothing.”
“True, true,” she said sadly. Then her eyes lightened again. “But, speaking of Caesar, what if we write the old guy a letter?”
“I think I see what you mean.” Pilate’s eyes also began to brighten. “We could write Caesar a letter about Herod.”
“--A letter telling him how bungling and inefficient Herod is getting.”
He scratched his head. “He’s not really bungling and inefficient. He’s just tyrannical.”
“So what?” she smiled broadly. “How is Caesar to know? Do you think he will come all the way from Rome to check?”
“And if he writes Herod--?”
“Of course, Herod would deny it. Who would admit to being bungling and inefficient, even it were true?”
“So it would be his word against ours.”
“Unfortunately.” Portia scratched her head. Then her eyes lit up more brightly than before. “--Unless we could manage to get several letters to Caesar from different people, citing actual cases.”
“You mean, forge letters?”
“An excellent idea! I always said you had a good head on your shoulders, Pilate. Yes, and in fact, we wouldn’t have to send one from us at all. After all, he’d be more likely to listen to the common people on such a matter, wouldn’t you think?”
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