The Art of Good Enough

Improve the Fit Between Your Strengths and Your Life

Every one of us lives three lives simultaneously: public life, personal life, and private life. Your sense of happiness depends on the level of harmony among these lives.

Your private life is your thoughts and beliefs. It’s the smallest unit of all three lives, yet it determines the level of satisfaction you feel toward your other two lives. Your personal life is your circle of family and close friends. They are the pillars of your universe. When your private life fails to align with your personal life, you may experience resentment, anger, and likely physical pain. Your public life is where you interact with people outside of your personal life. It could be your job, social groups, religious organizations, and of course, social media. Most of us try to be our best in the public eye, highlighting what we have and covering up what we lack in our personal and private lives. When the gap between our public image and the truth enlarges, our happiness declines. We feel awful for two reasons: the pressure to keep up with what people expect of us, and the inability to change our personal and private lives.

With the social media boom comes the great irony: we keep posting our polished happy photos and stories when, in fact, we can barely hold on. The images we project and the number of likes and shares we get become the indicator of our worth. We are tormented by our desire to look good and feel proud. It’s a chain we put around our own necks. We no longer live free and true to ourselves.

We have to break that chain.

All positive changes must originate from your private life and then propagate your personal life, and eventually your public life.

If you have been unhappy for a while, you get stuck in a thought pattern that every trivial thing happening to you confirms your suffering. The self-fulfilling prophecy of failure makes it more taxing to complete your tasks at work and at home. If you want to be happy, healthy, and confident, stop this negative belief. Think about how your strengths can help you overcome challenges more effectively.