or as long as I can remember, there was Man in my life.
Dominant, all-important, ever-absorbing man.
Dad.
Boyfriends or boy obsessions before puberty and onwards.
Husband #1 (four years).
Husband #2 (six years).
My entire twenties: married.
Different countries, different cities.
One lover.
And now, terrified and giddy at once: alone, at last!
By now I have a life of my own. I am a full-fledged human with a social security number, a green card, a full-time passion job. Friends.
My coworkers are my friends. The volunteers in the crew I manage are my friends. Helen and Gisela, wiser women in different stages of life, guiding me.
I have a social fabric. A net to catch me. High-caliber, brilliant people who care for me.
I can do this. For a couple months, there is ecstasy. Freedom is going to my head. I have e-man-cipated myself.
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