The Enigma Stolen

Quip asked, “How about twenty-five thousand Euros for an hour, and I’ll throw in a world class Australian barbie with Argentinian beef, but presented in a Texas style offering. What do you say to that? Do we have a deal?”

Tuck shifted uneasily in his chair as he responded, “You mean like that Texas barbeque you invited me to a while back with that bachelors party the night before? I remember a lot of it, and those pictures you posted of those …”

Quip smiled, nodded and interrupted, “Yep, those top heavy, wide-hipped gals dressed to maximum distraction, who served drinks so fast that no one saw the bottom of an empty glass. Yes, sir, that kind of Australian barbie served up Texas style.”

Tuck’s imagination ran out of control with the erotic images. “I can give you forty minutes, not a minute more.”

Quip grinned. “Okay! Forty minutes for twenty thousand Euros and I’ll still throw in the Australian barbie with Argentinian beef, Texas style. When can you be ready?”

Tuck, completely taken in, asked, “Uh, no one needs to hear about this, right?”

Quip, in a most accommodating tone, answered, “Push-tush! This is just a friendly discussion between us lads. No one will hear it from me! Email me the details as soon as you can, along with account information so I can effect a wire transfer.

“Oh, and one last thing. Do you still do that Saturation of Unlimited Message Pounding and Protection, or SUMPP for short, program to protect valuable computer resources from a cyber-onslaught?”

Tuck puzzled a moment but then said, “It was part of our old business model to protect customers from Distributed Denial of Service Attacks, but we don’t do DDOS protection services anymore. Why?”

Quip responded, “Well, my high-value endpoint that is the object of my interrogation is about to be pounded digitally, and I didn’t want them smoked before I had a chance to chat with them. Can you throw in a little SUMPP for my Finnish friend at the end point I will give you? I just love the way you send those computer DDOS attacks to the planet Jupiter! The disbelief and follow-on banter from the assassins just cracks me up when they learn nothing got hit by their attack!”

Tuck chuckled slightly and agreed, “Well, okay! You better throw in the good Kansas City barbeque sauce! We’ll talk again soon.”

Tuck disconnected the call and wistfully stared out the window only to be shocked back to reality when he heard Gina as she leaned on the doorway to his office.

Gina admonished, “Australian barbie, served up Texas style, by top heavy, wide-hipped gals dressed to maximum distraction? Let me guess, we aren’t going to be able to list this as a customer reference on our website, are we?”