Now she had made sure of his whereabouts, Becca started hunting around for her clothes, and finally found both T-shirt and bra where they had been tossed, in the front passenger seat. She wriggled back into her bra quickly, wanting to be dressed before Jon's return; she was pretty certain she would not make it out of the backseat if she wasn't. Not after last night. Becca thought of their first night together, holding hands; their second night, spent in each other's arms. On their third night . . . her smile grew as she pondered the possibilities.
As she reached back to fasten the hooks, Becca's fingers brushed over her scar; the memory of Jon's lips blessing it almost made her cry again. Shaking her head and pulling herself back to the present, Becca rummaged through her bag for something close to a clean T-shirt. And as she searched, she thought about their conversation last night, after they had come so close to having sex. The thought of which made her breath catch in her chest.
She forced her thoughts back to what Jon had said, and had to admit he had been right. She would always have wondered about her own motives, let alone his, if they had gone any further right then. But this morning, she knew two things. She felt no more doubts—she did want him, as much as he wanted her. And nervous she might be, but it was going to happen today.
Because, if she was honest with herself, there was still enough insecurity left in her to worry about what would happen once they were no longer stranded together. Not that she thought Jon would simply walk away from her; they were already beyond that, it seemed. But Becca had a powerful feeling that everything depended on what would happen between them today. And it wasn't just about sex; it was about how much they were willing to trust each other, and how much that would change them, both of them. She knew somehow that the intensity of that trust, of their coming together, would not be as strong, or as permanent, if it happened later—if they waited until they were seeing each other when they could in normal everyday life. Becca shook her head, puzzled. It didn't quite make sense to her, but she felt she was right about this. Their future, if they were to have one, had to start here and now, in the middle of this impossible situation. Or it wouldn't last.
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