Moss sat in each corner and rode up the walls of Blae’s mind. The thin air smelled like dead bodies. He hated this place. No matter how many times Blae tried, he couldn’t leave his mind. Time moved differently. He didn’t know how long he’d been stuck here. His Lifeblood didn’t respond to him. His mind manifested as a maze the way Kaige taught him. Darkness hung like angry vines across his walls and doors.
Blae never understood why Royal and Divine liked going into their minds. His was ugly. No matter how many times Blae re-imagined this place, his mind reminded him of a forgotten building used only by the homeless. The smell rolling through the halls was horrendous.
Now, he was trapped in this swamp.
Years ago, he worked himself up to tell Aliceanna about his revolting mind. She wasn’t surprised. She said anger made a home inside him. Blae didn’t understand. He didn’t get angry. Annoyed, aggravated, but never angry.
Now, he knew where the rage came from.
When they lived in Silhouette, Blae spent his life being steered around by Royal’s emotions. He hated it. He hated her. In retaliation, he took pleasure in making her suffer. Divine and Royal enjoyed playing games with each other. Their tricks were nothing compared to the torment he put Royal threw. She wanted his approval. He used it against her.
His feelings toward Royal could explain most of the Darkness inside his mind.
Aliceanna said he hated everyone. That wasn’t true. He liked her and now Divine. A general disdain for people did not equal hate. It wasn’t his fault most people were a waste of skin.
Blae spent some time roaming the halls, opening doors. No matter how he commanded, his mind wouldn’t show him happy memories. The doors only showed him as a person who took revenge by playing with another’s Darkness. He already knew that. He’d seen Cora race through town in a rage. It got her nowhere except in trouble. It was more satisfying hurting the soul, not the body.
If he took such pleasure in his revenge, why did his stomach twist as he replayed them?
He was sick of this place. Some moron thought they could control his mind. Thought they could trap him here. They did not know who he was.
The memories revealed Blae’s real feelings for his older half-brother. Those stung the most. Blae didn’t get his feelings hurt. He hurt others.
He always wanted Bel to look at him, to treat him the way Kaige treated Cora. Blae practiced with Bel not because he cared to learn more about his power. He wanted to be with his older brother. Training was the only time Bel paid attention to him.
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